|My Dog Just Registered for a Triathlon |
Good morning!Last Tuesday was a solid, steadily paced day at the cardiology office for me. Patients are, fortunately, once again coming in for the care they need. It feels good to dust off some of the cobwebs and have the band back together.As I arrive back home and pull into our driveway, my family is out there wearing masks and talking to our neighbors, also wearing masks. I’m thirsty so before heading out to say hi, I beeline to the fridge when I catch something peculiar over my right shoulder.Down the hall, I see Phoebe (pictured below), sitting on our office chair with her paws up on the computer keyboard.Yes, she is smart (proud papa), but nonetheless, this was of course surprising.It appears she’s interacting with the computer, so I figure, why not, let’s ask her a question,“What are you doing, young lady?” I say in baby talk.“I’m registering for a Half Ironman triathlon”Now I’m on my heels.In her 5+ years, this is the first time she’s spoken to me. In fairness to her, it may be the first time I’ve asked her a question.
She breaks the long pause.“Dad, how many steps a day are you getting?” Her voice is deeper than I’d been using for her, I feel guilty.“A lot, Phoebe”.“Exactly. Multiply that by 4 (our family size) and guess who has been going on ALL those walks/runs for the last 3+ months?”“Right. Dad, my endurance is at its peak right now. I need to capitalize.”
“Phoebe, you do know there’s swimming and biking in triathlons, right?“I can swim, and as far as the bike, I have a video I need you to see.I have a question. Do I register as a 5 year old or 35 year old?”“You know how they say one of my years is the same…”
“Yes, I’m aware.” It’s difficult holding back the smirk. She has a fair point about all the walks/runs. I need to show her the proper respect.“If I were you, I’d register as a 5 year old – I presume there’s much less competition within that age group”“Which event are you doing, Phoebe?” “Madison, Wisconsin”“How’d you pick that one?“They have XS Ironman shirts and I only weigh 35 lbs. They also have peanut butter sandwiches at the run aid stations. I wanted to do Boulder but they have only chocolate power bars. You told me I’m not allowed to eat chocolate. This is all sinking in. I’m having a full on conversation with our dog and my family is missing the whole thing. “I’m going to need your credit card.”I must’ve still had that deer in the headlights glaze.“Dad, I’m a dog, You know I don’t have a VISA card”
Moral of the story is as follows.If you have multiple family members, you might want to ‘group’ your walks.At least in our house, things can go sideways, real quick.
Speaking of walking, have you seen this supercool article?